At times it can feel like telling your story, protesting, donating, crying, yelling, making phone calls, educating, and earnest conversations don't make enough of a difference. Some days you feel worn down, heartbroken, and helpless. No matter how you're feeling right now, you are valuable and deserve care. Today, and especially on days when it feels like nothing is in your control, please do one good thing that reminds you that your well-being matters. One of these may be

I recently got sick traveling home from a great trip. I ended up with a weird combination of the flu, strep, and an ear infection, followed by a ruptured eardrum and laryngitis. I was so sick that all work and most other responsibilities, including those that had already backlogged while I was traveling, had to be put on hold. I’m grateful that I was able to get the support I needed and that I was able to ask for and receive help. There was a time when postponing meetings,

As 2017 seems to rush to an end, I'm steadying myself in an intention that feels grounding when it seems like time is flying. (Because wow, wasn't it just Halloween?) This intention is also a solid first step to offering myself compassion when things get heavy and I'm teetering on the edge of overwhelmed. It's really simple. Take a breath and ask, "What am I willing to notice?" This question isn't meant to withdraw us from participating in the world, but to engage a lit

Something I hear a lot is "I know _____ (exercise, taking my medication, eating breakfast, going to bed on time, etc.) is such a small and easy thing. Everyone else is able to do it, but for some reason I just can't get my act together." I just wanted to send you a reminder today that 1) sometimes the "easy" stuff is actually really hard and takes a lot of energy and 2) you aren't alone if you feel that way. We don't like to look at the shadow side of the self care movement a

It’s ok to waver in your self care. Even if you know what a difference it makes and you're struggling without it. Even if you’ve learned your lesson about going to bed on time many times over and you’ve slipped back into old patterns of putting it off. Even if you’ve worked to have a friendlier relationship with your body and today you’re really vulnerable and only feel negative thoughts. Even if you spent months getting into the habit of getting yourself to a wee

There was a time when I thought the number one most important thing that anyone needed to know about self care was how to get a good night's sleep. Later, I thought it might be exercise or stress management or deep breathing. I still think those things are important, but they are just things that you do to take care of yourself. Compassion is the actual foundation of self care. Once you can be compassionate with yourself through the full spectrum of your emotions, action

No matter what side you’re on, the U.S feels more divided than ever, doesn’t it? The people you love most may be divided, too. When people are at odds with each other, it’s natural to feel anger, concern, fear, or grief. Yet here you are, big-hearted soul. And you are still breathing. Take a moment to place a hand over your heart or your belly, directly onto your skin if you can. Feel the warmth radiating from your palm and fingers onto your chest or the softness of

Exercise used to be my unhealthy obsession. It usually felt joyless, but I gave it hours every day. I’d jog alone at night and lift weights so aggressively that I was nearly always sore. If someone delayed my "workout" (a term I rarely use now!), I would get so anxious that I wanted to cry. My friends called me a health nut, but when I was honest with myself, I wasn’t exercising for my health. I was willingly sacrificing my safety and mental health to shrink my body into OK-n

Eight years ago, before I really learned how to nurture myself, I was convinced for a while that slowing down might break me. When I got home at the end of a long day, I was often so tired that all I wanted to do was flop on the couch, but as soon as I did, I felt restless and anxious. As soon as I closed my eyes to meditate, I’d either break into tears or a cold sweat. For the life of me, I couldn’t lure my body into a full night’s sleep. I sometimes see this in clients a

This past year, I’ve been grieving. Grief can be an alarmingly unpredictable thing, swinging you perilously between panic, numbness, stomach-turning sadness, and peace, sometimes within the course of a day, an hour, even a minute. And oh boy, the tears. We have a difficult time with tears in our culture, don’t we? There are times, of course, when crying is inconvenient or feels inappropriate. There are other times when crying is thoroughly inescapable and you hav